That X that saved my life ( + Casey Jones - Hammer the nails + lyrics + brief explanations )

I thought I was lost
I was just waiting to be saved
I was asleep and couldn't see
The X that saved my life
I was a jerk running around
Wasting my time my life and all what I cared about
When the X came in my life
And when failure came to its peak
And when I hit the bottom of that pit
I kicked back to the surface
Reaching for this X that saved my life
I have never bragged about it
Even if it's my pride
I've never screamed "I AM STRAIGHTEDGE"
I am in this for myself
The path is long
That road is the toughest
But I can't give up that X
That X that saved my life
I will not break this
Won't fuck this thing up
Even if it is not written on my skin
The X is graved in my heart
Because the X has saved my life.
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Casey Jones - Hammer the nails






LYRICS


When will you see
The words I scream are reality
Pure, clean and free
I'm not these things, they are me
Growing up and growing old
Some will try to pull me down
But I won't let them change my ways
I will always be this free
And nothing you will say
Will keep me from my ways
And nothing you can do
Will ever change me into you
I live my life for me not you
I am these words so fuck you
Straight edge is me
Until the day I die

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I chose to add this clip because Casey Jones is the band that has made me discover what straight edge really is. Back in 2009, I was listening to that band, because I used to find the songs , singalongs really epic. But then I started looking at the lyrics and I've started to want to know more about all that "straightedge" stuff. Quickly I have recognized myself in this way of thinking, and this clean way of life. Back in these days I used to enjoy going out , have a drink, etc, but I was kind of feeling this wasn't my place. So, on the 8th of may 2009, I became "that guy", "the straightedge guy", lost in the middle of this culture of dope, drugs, alcohol and all that. I was kind of lost in this new way of life, but at least I was feeling as myself. Since those days it hasn't been always easy, always fun, but being in control of  your life is a luxury many people can't afford. So what people could call "sacrifices" are a cheap price to show everybody how I really am without using any substance.

Of course I have made a choice for my life, but it doesn't mean I don't respect other people's choice, even if it is tough to comprehend them when they are made by the closest persons you have. It takes some strength to be a positive edger, because it is very difficult to feel something else than hate and disgust towards people who are the opposite of what you'd expect them to be. But the main thing, in order to live in harmony with other people is to always remember this : "I do this for myself, not for others. I'm not a preacher, but I must lead by my example."